Things I Learned From My GrandFather

I was sitting with a friend of mine recently when he noticed a passage in my journal that read:

I sometimes wonder about our industrial assembly line approach to work. Does it still work the way it worked when Henry Ford was producing cars there were any color you want as long as it’s black. I am starting to believe more and more that today’s workforce requires a more organic (agrarian) approach. Although they exist, high performance environments that are driven by threats and negativity are rare. Those types of environments talk about things like compliance, and ultimately that leads to mediocre performance. Not excellence and growth. A good manager understands that the burden of good performance starts with them. Its starts by letting people know what they should be accomplishing and then creating the environment and opportunity to do it their own way.

He then asked “do your thoughts comes from all the reading you do or is there something else that helped you form this philosophy”. After a moment of thinking I realized that my strong beliefs about management, employees and how I conduct myself when dealing with people came from the man who was the most positive male role model I ever had – my maternal grandfather. It has taken me many years, and many enlightening experiences to see how lessons I learned when I was 8 or 9 have impacted my life. Here are a few things I learned from him along the way.

The World Doesn’t Revolve Around You

It’s easy to see how a child might think that the world revolves around them. We spend most of our early childhood with parents, sibling, aunts, uncles and grandparents tending to all of our needs and wants. When I was at my grandparents house one summer I distinctly remember thinking that “all the kids in the neighborhood” didn’t like me. When I told my grandfather he said “boy, those kids don’t care about you…” My grandfather was essentially telling me that people are too consumed with their own affairs to really spend time worrying about you. So, as a kid you can think the world revolves around you, but as adults such beliefs are limiting.

Accountability Goes A Long Way

One of the life lessons that I have always passed on to staff members is how I learned what accountability really meant. One day when I was working with my grandfather he asked me to do a task a specific way. Now usually it wouldn’t be a problem if I decided to be “Kelsey” and do it my own way. On this day I did it totally wrong and my grandfather decided not to pay me because he didn’t want me just to “complete a task” he wanted me to “get the right result”. It didn’t matter that someone had suggested I do it that way. I learned that day that the only person who is responsible for my actions is me.

Your Values Only Mean Something When Times Are Tough

My grandfather was a minister so naturally some of what we learned when we spent time with him were influenced by that. One of those lessons really can be boiled down to “Do you really stand by the things you say you value?” Over time I learned that it’s easy to say you believe something when things are easy, but what happens to your “values” when times are tough, because that’s when your values will really be tested.

A Few Words Will Never Fix Your Character or Your Actions Are Louder Than Your Words

OK, this one really came from my maternal grandmother, and it stuck with me because it really does make a lot of sense. When I was in the first grade I spent time in Savannah going to school with my cousin Jeannine. Jeannine was friends with a girl whose name I can’t remember so I will call her Tammy. To make a long story short my grandmother really did not like Tammy. We had been told we weren’t allowed to play with Tammy, and of course we didn’t listen. When my grandmother realized she was in the yard she told her that she had to leave. We were having a lot of fun so this Tammy decided to apologize for her past behavior. My grandmother didn’t care because that apology didn’t change Tammy’s character (I have to admit Tammy was a horrible influence). Those words didn’t change what was at the core and my grandmother knew it.

Looking back I really am glad the we had the opportunity to interact with this wise man.